Hi (:
My name is Chair and I rock.
Seventeen candles on the 28th September '09. I ♥ cocktails, cocaine, and clubbing.

PARAMORE
is the bomb.
you know you love me
xoxo


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at 9:28 PM

granny's cremation was today. mum broke down a couple of times. but seeing the coffin being pushed into the fire was my undoing. i think i've never cried this loudly. i always cry without any sound. i think that scene will stay in my head forever. memories of granny just kept playing back - way back; when she went with us to america 11 years ago, those times we brought her out for lunch, when she tries to give us money in secret without mum knowing, her birthday parties, her famous mee sua during CNY, when she was lying in the hospital bed, the last time i kissed her goodbye...........ah ma, i miss you so much. i want you to come back. here comes the tears........

a huge thank you to all my friends and family for showing their care and concern in one way or another; your condolences are deeply appreciated: rachel, arfah, bernice, siti, ethel, sam, yining, sarah, sukhveen, amanda, sufei, mrs tang, teri, haosheng, kenny, julie.........oh my, too many to name. I'm sorry to anyone if your name is not here, i'm not thinking really clearly right now. this big thank you is for you. special thanks to lou for coming down to the funeral so late. it meant the world to me. yingx, your phone call was priceless. you're my life girl. to all my uncles and aunts who came down to lend their support. especially aunty allyson, uncle patrick, aunty margaret, uncle donald and his wife for coming down twice. i love you all.

this funeral also marks the end of my mum's relationship with her siblings. literally. they all have no reason to meet up anymore. and my mum is not on good terms with them anyway. in a nutshell, they were unfilial to my granny. not directly, but they basically fail to see that my bastard of an uncle( whom i do not acknowledge anymore) is wrong to chase my granny out of his house. sis and i are rather confused cos we just don't understand how these people think. THIS IS THE MAN WHO KICKED YOUR MOTHER OUT OF THE HOUSE AND YOU'RE EMBRACING HIM AS THOUGH HE DID NOTHING WRONG?? YOU EVEN WANT TO FORGIVE HIM EVEN THOUGH HE DID NOT APOLOGISE FOR HIS MISTAKE??!! (may i highlight, he did not apologise to my granny at all. didn't see her for 6,7 years until she died) are you insane or just downright stupid? anyone in the right frame of mind would know that is downright unfilial. whatever. i don't wish to associate myself with you beasts. and my first aunt is terrible. can you believe that she refused to let my granny cook rice or porridge cos she doesn't finish it??!! what kind of daughter are you?! and you go on ranting about buddhist teachings. oh my god. my toes are laughing. and now my granny is dead, she offers a whole tablefull of food. ironic isn't it? tell me, WHAT IS THE POINT?! granny's dead! she can't feel anymore. bloody hypocrite. i know the true person you are, moneysucker. i really don't wanna say this to my mum's family, but i have no choice. FUCK YOU ALL. (i choose to leave out liang hui. liang bao and liang yi)

i now announce to the world the names of those who have caused my granny so much pain. i see no reason to give you face at all.

Tng Tian Kiat
Ng Yoke Mei
Tng Ping Ping
Tng Jin Yau
Tng Lu Lu
Tng Jin Kit
Gan Keng Hwee
Gan Eu Jin
Gan Kai Ling

i hope all of you receive the worst retribution ever. gosh, i think i have to wash my hands with soap just typing their names. FUCK ALL OF YOU TO HELL. MAY THE DEVIL SPIT ON YOUR GRAVES.

it is because of this kind off people that kind civilians like the rest of us have to take moral education. we're just being dragged along with them. and I've got the bravest sister ever. she basically defaced all their names and announced loudly that the purpose of the stick she carries around is to beat up these "xiao ren". you go girl.

-i love you granny. may you rest in peace.